Look at how cute my room was in Los Angeles. So cozy, so delicately decorated; yes, with Ikea’s cheapest items, but still carefully selected and hand built to create my humble abode for a full year. It was the first time I had signed my name on a lease, the first time I had committed to my own space, and I felt like a full blown grown up.
And guess what?
None of that matters anymore because I’ve been drowning myself in the happiness and the freedom that I gained by getting rid of everything and considering home wherever my two suitcases are.
*cue sweat stains, sore arms, and repeated outfits*
I promise you, the only time I’ve thought about this apartment has been this very moment, to write this blog. I’ve mentioned before that I woke up one morning realizing that it was just time. I was sick of being sick of routine; and this is me, as a YouTuber and blogger. The fact that I had to pay rent to be chained to a property was enough to make me feel monotonous.
I had my doubts about moving out and living as a nomad, as anyone would;
but I bit the bullet because why the hell not. If it was a fail, at least it would be “research” for more blogs and videos. The fact that we can never predict what happens if we take risks made me curious to find out.
I can truly tell you that I’ve been happier than I’ve ever been, probably in my entire life. I’m filled with energy everyday, due to the fact I have no idea what’s going to happen wherever I go. I’m working and learning on a daily basis, but it doesn’t feel like it, because I’m in my element; discomfort. And I’m in a constant stage of newness in my friendships, which is my all-time favorite. Of course, I miss people from back home who know that I can’t walk and hold a cup of coffee without spilling on myself, or who have laughed at me when I tripped walking down the street at least once a day, but I always manage to grow closer to my good friends and family despite the distance.
Thank you, world wide web.
Yes, it was a beautiful stage in our lives living in Koreatown, we grew our YouTube channel, as Damon said, we heard Joshua hit those notes in Lady Gaga’s hottest singles, we laughed at the wiener dog that would mean mug us every time we were home.
But those memories won’t disappear because the building is getting demolished and because we moved out.
*Could the situation be more dramatic?*
A lot of us like to pretend that this time we have lasts forever, and even more of us fear what happens beyond what we know. But to put it simply, once I got out of that apartment and the mental restraint of obeying a lease and paying rent, my day to day makes me feel like I’m Mario, and just ate shroom to level up.
Why you gotta think like that though?
The indulgence of every meal, the tingle with perfect sips of wine, the expansion of my mind with conversations in Italian, the connection with people I didn’t even know existed three weeks ago, is too significant to ignore.
Ask me if I plan on signing another year lease anywhere in the States anytime soon and I’ll tell you simple:
I think about LA, and I think about the people I’ve started to consider my family there. But then I think about how I will return, full of stories and life lived to share with them. Most of all, I know my happiness is fully dependent on my ability to keep growing and learning. Yes, I’ll miss Slurpin’ Ramen, Roll Roll Roll and how hard it was to pronounce that. Most of all, I will miss the puppies randomly running into our apartment; making me feel like I was back in my dorm days.
I have to admit, I’ll enjoy missing home. Because if I’m missing home, that only means I’m doing something extraordinary that I’ll miss when I finally return Stateside.
Arrivederci Los Angeles.