I’m going to keep it real – I know I can overspend.
The thing is… I’ll never spend hundreds of dollars on clothes or material possessions, but I’ll quickly clear my bank account for some experiences. But we all know experiences ain’t always cheap.
I’m from Connecticut, right outside of New York City. Although I’ve been to NYC dozens of times, I constantly find myself blowing cash like it’s my first time visiting this city. Even worse, I’m always passing time in Brooklyn and (grace à gentrification), Brooklyn’s prices are rising like Mariah Carey’s riffs in “Emotions.” Ya’ feel me?
Anyhow, I spent about 8 hours in BK and tried to only spend $20. Let’s see where that got me! Wish me luck!
What's Poppin' in BK?
3 Dollar Bill – $5.00
Despite this bar being called 3 Dollar Bill, my happy-hour chardonnay cost $5. Ya’ know what? I’m not even going to complain, because I’ve spent well over $17 on a single drink in New York. I’ll take the $5 ANY DAY.
My friend and I came across 3 Dollar Bill by accident. We had to pee so bad, so we Googled bars (ps. I love how “to google” is a verb. Like, okay English language & consumerism).
We were directed to a particular bar, but it was closed. Basically, our bladders were pregnant, and our waters were ready to break at any moment. We wobbled down the street to the closest bar, which happened to have a rainbow flag plastered on the window.
When I walked in, something felt interesting. “Interesting” in the best sense of the word, of course! There were pictures of Madonna on the wall, hunky bartenders, a DJ with a perm and dark eye makeup. HUNNY, it was a gay bar!
I love how my lil’ ol’ queer self casually ended up in a gay bar in Brooklyn. On top of that, I only spent $5 – HOLLA! (But actually, check this place out. It’s super loungy and chic. It’s perfect for when you want to take your new boo on a date.)
Vanessa’s Dumpling House – $9.90
Did somebody say shrimp dumplings? I’m such a hoe for seafood. My bestie found Vanessa’s on Yelp. We refused to pay Williamsburg prices for a simple burger, so a quick Yelp + IG search saved us a solid 10 bucks.
Here’s what we got:
An order of shrimp dumplings
An order of seaweed salad
2 chicken pancakes
Yep. We can eat, and there’s absolutely no shame in our game. Each person’s portion came out to $9.90. Mind you – we both ate enough for 2 dang meals. As Queen Nicki would say, “We ain’t missin’ NO meals.”
Have you ever experienced an NYC summer? One word: disgusting. NYC summers make you wish you would’ve picked a different time of year to visit. This day, it got so humid that my upper armpit arm meat began to stick to my underarm skin – now that’s gross. On top of that, no matter how much deodorant I wear, I’m never safe. #NASTY (and not in a good Janet Jackson type of way. This song will change your life. Thank me later.)
For this reason, I constantly found myself buying jumbo waters whenever I had the chance. I will say that Brooklyn needs to NOT charge $5 for a water bottle when I can get one for $1 at a bodega anywhere else. Don’t play games with my pockets, Brooklyn. Also, is it possible for an entire city to have central air conditioning? It’s 2018 – let’s get started on that!
Domino Park – (Free & Priceless)
After Vanessa’s, we had to walk off the food.
We were heading towards the water, but we sort of lost hope for our friendly rendezvous in front of the water when we saw a massive construction site.
We soon found out that NYC likes to lie and pretend like the construction is shutting things down. When in reality, you can usually get in from another entrance. Mhm, shady.
On our way down, we quickly glanced at the adorable guys doin’ their thing at the skatepark. When we thought we were safe, we saw more gorgeousness playin’ volleyball. They almost had my undivided attention until I realized that we were right under the Williamsburg Bridge.
Bridge > Boys
This is one of the cutest views. You have the bridge above you if you dare to take a stroll hundreds of feet in the air. Then you have a view of Manhattan, which personally made me question how long it would take to get to the other side via boat. Then there’s a dog park full of tiny doggies who bully the bigger ones. Basically, I was in an episode of Broad City. But not the episode where Abbi and Ilana see a “murder,” break into someone’s house, and find out that it was just the person’s sex doll. Yeah – not that episode.
That would just be awkward.
DAILY TOTAL: $19.50
Phew! I just made the cut. But let’s not mention how the Metro-North ticket from NYC to Connecticut costs a whopping $15.00 one-way.
But for the purpose of this blog post, I kicked Brooklyn’s @$$ by only spending $20! Now I have more money to spend on cheap flights. #WINNING
What are your favorite things to do in Brooklyn?